Dale Carnegie wrote these ideas in his 1936 book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People.”
The ideas are just as valid today as they where then. I first read them in grade school over 40 years ago and I still work on perfecting these concepts daily.
Now for the exercise. Go through the list and give yourself a numeric grade from 100 to 0 depending on how well you think you are doing with each. For example, I LOVE to argue, so I’d have to give myself about a 65 on that one. But, I happen to have many friends who have very different opinions from my own, and I believe we can all co-exist amicably, so I’ll give myself a 90 on that one.
After you rate yourself, pick just one that you want to improve and spend the next week devising a method of improving it. (Make sure you have a way to recognize improvement.)
Win people to your way of thinking
- The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
- Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
- If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
- Begin in a friendly way.
- Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
- Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
- Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
- Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
- Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
- Appeal to the nobler motives.
- Dramatize your ideas.
- Throw down a challenge.